1. I ALWAYS had to be drunk. I had to get drunk. I couldn’t have just one I needed to be the drunkest one in the room whether I knew it or not.
2. I was obsessed with alcohol. I had to know who had it, where to get it, and how long I had access to it
3. I HAD to have it around just in case I wanted it. Not because I wanted to drink but because I wanted it there in case I wanted to drink.
4. I still drank even though bad things happened when I did.
5. Being drunk put me in dangerous situations that caused me and others harm and I still drank.
6. I got pissed when I couldn’t get drunk fast enough. A common phrase I would use is “I’ve had X amount of drink and I Can’t feel a thing” I HAD to feel it. I couldn’t be happy unless I was feeling it
7. Others didnt drink as much as me. I always drank the fastest, the most, and got sick the most
8. I would make sure I had enough money to buy alcohol and when I didnt I manipulated people into buying it for me either with “favors” or straight lies
9. I hid my drinking. If its to a problem why’d I hide it?
10. I had to drink more to get drunk and im not talking about first time versus 6th time. I’m talking about progressively having to have more to drink than before. I was once able to get drunk on 2 glasses of wine then 3 then 4 then 5 then 2 bottles I was always progressing.
11. I put drinking before other things. I can’t hang out I can’t do chores I have to get drunk.
12. I ended up drinking alone most of the time (But it started out socially)
13. I drank when I was sad/mad/negative emotion
14. I drank when I experience any and all emotions.
15. My first solution was to drink. Get off work need to relax? Drink. Mad? Drink. Want to get amped up for something? Drink
16. I blacked out almost every time I drank.
Thats all I can think of now. Remember its a progressive disease so it may not seem “that” bad to you now but it will get there.
Please add to the list if you have a sign.
mentallyrecovering